Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Round Two Is Behind Us!

Covered Bridge near Tellico Plains, TN
November 3, 2013

I am so thankful to report that yes, Chemo Treatment Round Two is behind us.  Bill has entered the "recovery" period and will have a week of reprieve before his third and last treatment on Monday, November 25.  In many ways, round two was a bit easier as we were able to make some adjustments in meds based on the things we learned from round one.  As we'd been told, round two was similar to round one in the timing of how specific side effects hit.  But there were many things that were different and with the nausea better controlled, it seems a couple of other unpleasant side effects took center stage.  His "recovery" period actually was a full day later in getting here.  We weren't expecting that!  The cumulative effects are more evident as he is still quite fatigued, has lost more weight and just doesn't have the stamina he'd hoped for.  He is doing a terrific job managing his activity and trying his best to eat food that will provide nourishment even though those aren't necessarily the things which sound the best to him.  He is sleeping well and that, in itself is a blessing. 

How am I coping?  That's a good question.  Some days I feel like I'm doing great - other days, not so much!  Some days, this all still seems like a dream and I'll wake up with everything being as it was except that I'll have a renewed appreciation for the strengths of my husband and the stability he has always brought to our marriage.  We've talked a lot over the past few weeks about how neither of us feel we've ever taken the other for granted, but when faced with having to handle EVERYTHING, you suddenly realize how much your spouse does on a daily basis that he just did and you never thought twice about it.  Most days, I'm well aware that this is no dream and we have a long way to go before our life will be "normal" again.  I also believe that our "normal" will look very different.  We are both changed people (for the better, I hope).  Another topic of conversation has been ways in which we will live differently with priorities that might be a bit kinder, gentler and less self-centered. I expect there will be a lot more about that in upcoming blog posts!

There are a few things I have managed to do quite well and I think that has been advantageous to my overall ability to cope.  I have faithfully exercised with very few days that I have not recorded at least 10,000 steps on my pedometer.  When Bill has been so sick, I've been unable to eat either, so yes, I've lost weight, but during his recovery week, we eat well and therefore, my weight balances out.  During the most stressful period I've ever experienced, I'm managing to maintain an exercise routine AND maintain my weight.  That tells me I've learned something through the years that is able to run on auto-pilot when it has to.  My dear friend, Debby, wrote a post over the weekend that really spoke to me and said some of these same things.  She's been doing some thinking too!  Here's a link to that post.

The thing which seems to be most evident of my stress is my inability to concentrate.  I can't settle down to read, I have no desire to cook, even sitting down to write takes a lot of effort.  I leave one room to get something out of another and when I get there, I can't remember what I needed.  I've learned that leaving the house without a detailed, specific list of where I'm going and what I need from each store is futile.  Bill doesn't seem to be having this problem - I'm the one who seems to have Chemo brain!

When you read this, I will either be heading out to my beloved mountains to hike or already be there.  Thanks to wonderful friends who have said, just let us know when you can go, we've planned a short hike to accommodate the fact that I'm way out of shape, but it will get me in the woods and on a trail.  Right now, I can't think of anything more therapeutic.

17 comments:

  1. I love the covered bridges you have over there is the states, we have nothing like that here. Pray you and Boll come through this stronger.

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  2. YEA!! Only one more to go! David had the same experience that as soon as they got one side effect under control another would raise its head. So thankful Bill is sleeping well. That was one of David's biggest problems, he couldn't sleep. This business really knocks the body for a loop....tired, no stamina. Glad to hear you will be out hiking in the renewing natural world. Being the caregiver is very hard work and I'm not at all surprised at the way it is manifesting in you. Exercise is both physically and mentally important. You are both in our hearts!

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  3. Good for you for taking care of yourself. Don't hold back from asking your friends to help you batch cook meals for you for the freezer during the remission weeks- soups and stews and easy (but nutritious) foods for you to digest during the tough times.

    Take care and keeping you and Bill in my prayers. Glad you have the skills set up for "auto pilot" that help you maintain your health.

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  4. Coincidentally I have been particularly thinking of you when I've hiked:)

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  5. Continued thinking of you; take care. Nothing like a brush with serious illness to change your priorities!

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  6. Buh-bye, Round Two!

    Something like this really does cause a perspective realignment, doesn't it? You'll definitely come out of it with a whole new 'normal.'

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  7. Beautiful covered bridge! Glad to hear round two is done and that you are going off on a much-needed hike. I always say, hiking makes everything better. Hang in there! :)

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  8. Yeah! for a hike! It will renew your spirit and your body and your mind!! And yes, your journey was just one of the many things I was thinking about as I wrote. In the midst of crisis, we get a burst of clarity as to what is really important in life.

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  9. So glad to hear that you are both holding up well, and that you have a big part of a very unpleasant journey behind you. Hugs and support for the remainder are headed your way.

    You wrote that the new "normal" will look very different" and I'm guessing you may be right. That isn't always a bad thing though - illness certainly changed our priorities, and I think for the better. My own beloved Bill's period of poor health brought us even closer and made us appreciate each other more and, very definitely, appreciate the good things about the life we have.

    As to that "inability to concentrate" - don't sweat it. Your focus right now is the most important thing and that's health - both yours and Bill's. The rest isn't that great a deal and can be caught up with (if necessary) at a later date.

    Take care (both of you) and enjoy the outdoors whenever you can. May it bring you peace and strength.

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  10. Gorgeous bridge/location! You are both doing quite well....and your strength and resolve are shining, even if you don't think that they are! Huge, love, and prayers continue for you both!

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  11. Glad to hear you are out of round 2. Stay strong, both of you.

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  12. I'm glad to hear you are out of round two, and on a hike as well! :) *hugs* Sharon, to both of you!

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  13. Sharon,
    I cannot imagine how difficult your life must be right now. I am so sorry. My only advice is to give yourself a break on the forgetfulness thing. It is a part of stress and the more you fret over it the worse it becomes. Manage yourself with lists, etc just like you have been. Your mind will return in time.
    Lori

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  14. Two down and one to go!!!!! YEAH---you all can see the light at the end of the tunnel. The 3rd round will be easier --even if it is hard--simply because it is the LAST one. Then you two --with changed lives---can have the best late Thanksgiving and upcoming Christmas you have EVER had.. God Bless you BOTH… Glad you are getting out to do some hiking!
    Hugs,
    Betsy

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  15. I love that covered bridge! I love how you stay aware of what is going on inside as well as what is happening around you. No doubt you both will have learned much and changed for the better after going through this together. I am so glad you were able to get out on the trail again even for a short hike. It does wonders for the spirit. Stay strong - you are doing well. Blessings and prayers for you and Bill.

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  16. I'm glad round two is behind you both. I am sure that all of this is difficult for both of you despite your resolve. I think of you two often. I hope you both enjoy a restful weekend before that last treatment. Glad you are able to get a hike in, maybe another one??

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  17. Take care of both of you! I am glad round two is done. I have had friends who have dealt with them themselves or with a spouse and it is emotionally and physically draining for them. Hugs to you!

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