It Wasn't Planned!

 Cades Cove - Great Smoky Mountains National Park

June, 2014

When I last hit the “publish” button on February 6, I had no idea that I was about to take a five month break from writing the blog.  As a matter of fact, I already had the next post more than half written.  But as you can see, life intervened and for many reasons, some of which I may share and others that are very personal, the blog went on a lengthy hiatus.  For those of you that have remained in touch with me by email and have refused to let me go, I am eternally grateful. The last ten months have been among the most difficult periods of our lives and without the kindness, love and care from friends, we would not have made it.  That includes some of you and it is truly for that reason I've decided that yes, Gains and Losses will continue.  But I must warn you…..I am not the same person.  And this will not be the same blog.  That is the part with which I am having trouble coming to terms.  Life is very different now and I view most everything through an entirely different lens.  I’m excited to talk about it, but a tad apprehensive as well.  What if you no longer like what I have to say?  I guess time will tell!

To try and cover five months of our journey in one paragraph is ridiculous, but that is what I must do.  Bill completed his nine rounds of chemotherapy and 34 radiation treatments on March 6.  To say he went through hell is putting it mildly.  Only someone who has been through this themselves or been a caregiver to someone who has can truly understand.  Once treatment was completed, it was weeks before we began to see any evidence of improvement from the debilitating side effects.  But I am happy to say that although he still has a long way to go, things are improving and I see glimpses of my sweet, energizer bunny husband of 37 years.  We are told it will likely be up to a year before he feels “normal,” but, thankfully, he is beginning to eat solid food again and has stopped losing weight. The fatigue is still an issue, but with at least 10 hours of sleep at night, he is usually able to get by without an afternoon nap.  Every few days, a "fatigue" day will get him and he just has to give in and call it a day of rest.  Again, we are grateful that those days are becoming further apart and less severe when they do occur.

Our best news is that his three month post treatment scan revealed no evidence of any remaining cancer cells.  His Oncologist was confident this would be the case, but it sure felt good to hear the words.  We are told that his type of malignancy has a low rate of reoccurance, but this is cancer and as we all know, there are no guarantees.  So he will be monitored very carefully and we often wonder how long it will be before we are able to relax. 

My promise to myself was that IF I chose to begin writing again, I would keep my posts short, so holding to that promise, this is enough for now.  But there is much, much more to come.  It will be interesting to see who is still out there! 

Thanks Again!

It’s Good To Be Back