Monday, August 30, 2010

Ain't No Mountain High Enough

Trail Ridge Road - Elevation 12,183 feet
Rocky Mountain National Park - Colorado
May 29, 2009

Just got home from today's SECOND dining out experience.  How in the world did I let myself get into this mess?   Thank goodness, all are behind me now.  I feel like a stuffed pig.  This is not me and is most definitely not the way I want to eat.  Except for the fact that I have several pounds of damage to undo, the past days of all-out binge eating may have had an advantage.  I am so ready to slide into September and get all this garbage out of my system.  I really dislike the way I feel.

Here are some observations from my behavior today.  At both of the restaurants where I was "treated," there were decent choices I could have made.  I just didn't.  Why?  Two things come to mind.  1)  I am so full of sugar and white flour that I've lost all ability to reason.  I look at a menu and my eyes gravitate towards the menu items which contain high concentrations of those items and lots of calories.  I've fallen back in the trap of addiction to those items and will have to "detox" (translation: spend a miserable few days until sugar and flour  are out of my system) before I am free again and my body feels light.  2)  I am so focused on September 1 as a new start date that the "old" me (the one that diets instead of eating healthy) believes I should stuff myself until then because that's the day the "diet" starts.

Neither of those excuses are acceptable to me, so I plan to fight back by resuming healthy eating as of this very moment.   I am sick of feeling this way, frustrated with myself for letting it continue this long, and determined that there is no mountain high enough to get in the way of this girl getting her energy back and reaching her goal weight by December 31.

I am not aware of any obstacles on the horizon and I have spoken lovingly with MIL about the fact that I have gained some weight and it cannot continue.   So having said all that, I officially declare myself in detox.

Here's what that means:  (there's no new material here - you've seen this before from me, but it works!)
1)  No white flour
2)  No white sugar  (and as little sugar of any kind as possible)
3)  1200 calories per day
4)  no less than 10,000 steps per day
5)  no dining out
6)  post food, weight and daily steps on blog
7)  post each day's greatest challenge and greatest joy

I like and am using the Strategies for Success that I posted a few days ago, so here they are again: 
1)  Print comments from recent posts and place on pantry door, fridge, kitchen cabinets and freezer
2)  Blog, blog, blog
3)  Read blogs (make sure I've read "whole" stories of all my favorites)
4)  Find some "newbies" to embrace and encourage.
5)  Get outside 
6)  Get a massage (still have enough for 2 from Mr. B's Valentine's Day gift card)
7)  Move all my pictures to new computer
8)  Read "Born Round" by Frank Bruni (thanks, Sarah)
9)  Attend Small Groups and fully participate in Fall Festival of Faith at my church.
10) Finish reading, "The Me I Want To Be" by John Ortberg, the book being used for the Fall Festival.
11) Use my gift card from Bike Zoo
12) Buy a new hiking book and work on a fall hiking plan.
13) Make the changes that I've wanted to make on my blog and set some new goals for it.

To sum it up, I'm looking at 36-48 hours of feeling like you know what, then I'll gradually start feeling pretty good again.  Within a week, I'll have my energy back and the cravings for sugar and white flour will have subsided. At some point in the future, I'll go back and do some serious evaluation as to why this became the setback that it did.  Yes, I had compelling reasons to let go a bit, but it shouldn't have gone this far and at some point, I could've/should've stopped it.  I really want to dig deeper into that so maybe I can prevent it from happening in the future. 

But for now, I just want to move forward with determination and see some progress.  Yes, the road is long, the canyon is deep, the river is wide, the mountains are high, but nothing will keep me from reaching my goal.  And to quote one of my favorite movie characters, "that's all I'm going to say about that."


  1. The first 48 hours of carb detox are the hardest to get through and then it should be smooth sailing.

    Wishing you well. You can do this.

  2. Ok, I just have to comment again and tell you that the word verification I just had was flourj. Go figure, this has been happening a lot tonight where the word is something to do with the topic of the post or something I say in my comment. Strange!

  3. We are going to do this. Under the misery loves company category--I'll be detoxing with you. !

    I bought all kinds of lean protein, veggies and fruit today so that I have plenty of interesting things to eat. (I don't have to cut out fruit to get this done, although some do.)

    Next week at this time, we'll be glad we started now. :D


  4. You CAN do this Sharon, I know you can and will. Being weak around food is something I deal with everyday if not several times a day. I know that weakness will never go away and I have just decided to deal with it and know it is always lurking around the corner to nab me again! It is my life.

    Margie M. writes at:

  5. Wow, great job in recognizing what was going on, and to take immediate corrective action. Who hasn't fallen into the "diet starts tomorrow" mentality? That is the sort of thinking that brought us to the need for dieting in the first place. You ARE changing, Sharon, if you are seeing that excuse for what it is, and are making a move to eliminate that one (by making healthier choices immediately). I applaud this post, and your resolve! Well done ...

  6. You could so have been writing for me today! The second and third paragraphs are just what I am feeling. Yesterday for my anniversary we went out to lunch. I chose to eat unhealthy stuff. And that led to a day of crap. And I woke up today with regret. And this is not one isolate incident anymore. Tonight I host my book club and kept saying I just need to get through tonight. But I woke up today and told myself that I can start today and not eat the off-plan stuff that I serve for others and I can wake up tomorrow feeling better already.

    I am with you Sharon. I need this too. Let's do it:)

  7. That song (Marvin Gaye version) is one of the ones I have on my playlist when I run. I love the sentiment as well as the Psalm 139 version.
    You're going to succeed and feel so much better in no time at all. You've drawn a line in the sand. Love the RMNP picture. The road was closed the day we thought about going on it. You'll have fun making your hiking plan. We like to hike on the Appalachian Trail and often plan so that we can "bag" a new section. We're thinking of doing a section near Wintergreen, VA in September. Be strong, Sharon. You've got all kinds of us pulling for you.

  8. Both of those reasons make total sense, and are exactly what would go through my mind if I was in your situation.

    Well, Sept.1 is almost's a good starting date! :) (It was mine) There is so much scientific evidence out there that proves white flour/sugar processed products are truly addictive! It will be hard to rid your body of them, but it will be so much easier to stay in control when they are out of your system and diet. Eventually, they will turn your stomach completely.

  9. Good for you for taking those steps. I'm the same way. When I let refined carbs into my system, I lose my ability to reason. The detox sucks, but the results are worth it!

  10. I can so relate to your post. I've got to get through another two weeks of special events that require eating out. We'll make it together. That is what blogging is all about.

  11. You are on your way! I can read the enthusiasm and determination all over this post.
    When I first stopped the sugar and flour, you are right, it can be pretty icky for a few days. But you are also right--it's worth it. :-)

    Here's to a Stupendous September!

  12. I saw the same thing happening in restaurants my last days of my increasingly-indulgent vacation. For me it seemed less like intoxification with junk and more like the "last supper" feeling, since I knew I'd be getting back on track when I stepped off the plane.

    Actually, I confess, I had planned on being on track ON the plane, but then....well, after the plane that was IT.

    Hope you get something out of Born Round...

  13. I love this sentence:
    Yes, the road is long, the canyon is deep, the river is wide, the mountains are high, but nothing will keep me from reaching my goal.

    The road is long; slow; discouraging; full of obstacles and so on. But, moving forward only takes some step at a time. Each step helps you to build a new resolve and a new history. Stay with it. You can do it. You have been through a lot. Peace to you, Michele